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Lovable Lady Pottymouth Gifts_cover
Cheapism

We all know one. Some of us may even be one. If you have a lady in your life who swears like a sailor when she shaves her legs (nod to Iris DeMent and John Prine fans) or is known to let curses slip left and right without even realizing it, you can bet she’ll appreciate one of the gifts on this list.

Prices and availability are subject to change.

Related: 37 Unique Holiday Gift Ideas for Her Under $50

Middle Finger Necklace

Middle Finger Necklace
Etsy

$12 and up from Etsy

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Is she having a hard time with the boss? Are the teenage spawn mouthing off to her again? She can wear this necklace beneath her shirt (or let it show, if she’s feeling like she’s fresh out of you-know-whats) and sass back without even saying a word.

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Swear Words Keychain

Swear Words Keychain
Etsy

$13 from Etsy

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“Sentence enhancers” indeed. This metal keychain is the perfect accessory for the cursing woman who refuses to apologize for her vocabulary. 

Related: The Best Gifts for Women Who Have Everything

Black Cat Fucupcakes Tee

Black Cat Fucupcakes Tee
TeePublic

$16 from TeePublic

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If she’s not amused by people who won’t STFU, she’ll feel a kinship with this culinary cat, who also wishes everyone would just stop blathering on.

Holy Sh*t: A Brief History of Swearing

Holy Sh*t: A Brief History of Swearing
Amazon

$25 from Amazon

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Author Melissa Mohr wrote this book that takes a historical look at how we sometimes express ourselves. It’s been called an “ear-boggling tour of verbal depravity” and “fascinating and illuminating” by critics. 

Related: Fun and Hilarious Gag Gifts for the Prankster in Your Life

Bad*ss Bracelet

Bad*ss Bracelet
Etsy

$13 and up from Etsy

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This simple yet effective statement piece from Etsy seller Cynical Redhead comes in brass or aluminum and can be gifted to any confident woman aware of her own worth.

“Vert Der Ferk” Tee

vert der ferk T-Shirt
TeePublic

$16 from TeePublic

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This T-shirt is funny no matter if you know the character on it or not (for the record, it’s The Swedish Chef from “The Muppet Show”). It’s available in five styles, more than two dozen colors, and sizes up to 5XL.

Profanity Tea Towel

Etsy

$16 from Etsy

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Profane women are often passionate and fiercely love their families and friends. Let them proclaim that passion and ferocity with a tea towel — because irony is almost as dear to them as swear words. 

Related: Gifts for Sisters That Express a Lifetime of Love (and Then Some)

Profanity Notebooks

Profanity Notebooks
Etsy

$9 and up from Etsy

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What could be better than notebooks emblazoned with cuss words?

Morse Code Swear Word Bracelet

Morse Code Swear Word Bracelet
Etsy

$27 and up from Etsy

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If the woman in question is a mom with younger kids, she might not appreciate some of the other gifts on this list that quite literally spell out curse words. But she’ll probably love the secret sass behind these morse code-inspired bracelets that offer a few choices on pottymouth pithiness.

Here We … Go Again Mug

Here We Fucking Go Again I Mean Good Morning Mug
Etsy

$10 and up from Etsy

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Looking for the perfect gift for the dirty-mouthed woman who also isn’t a morning person? Here you go.

Related: Fun Family Games to Keep You Entertained at Home

Bards Dispense Profanity Game

Why So Ever Bards Dispense Profanity Game
Amazon

$29 from Amazon

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Just because her vocabulary is littered with dirty words doesn’t mean she can’t also be literary. If that sounds like someone you know, this game takes a “laugh-till-you-cry look at the Bard’s smutty side” and promises “raunchy hilarity.”

F-Bomb Paperweight

F-Bomb Paperweight
Uncommon Goods

$45 from Uncommon Goods

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Make it profane without using a single curse word? Yep, this recycled steel paperweight from Utah artist Fred Conlon does just that.

Blue Q Delicate Flower Socks

Blue Q Delicate Flower Socks
Amazon

$14 from Amazon

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She knows she’s not, which is what makes this pair of flower-adorned socks so ironically funny. Made of soft combed cotton and nylon, these are actually incredibly comfy, and Blue Q gives 1% of each sale to Doctors Without Borders/Medecins Sans Frontieres.

Genuine Fred Sh*tshow Jigsaw Puzzle

Genuine Fred Sh*tshow Jigsaw Puzzle
Amazon

$15 from Amazon

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Designed by multimedia Tennessee artist Wayne White, this 500-piece jigsaw puzzle is a colorful take on a euphemism for daily life.

Related: Gifts for People Who Love Jigsaw Puzzles

You Are … Awesome Coloring Book

You Are Fucking Awesome: A Motivating Swear Word Coloring Book for Adults
Amazon

$10 from Amazon

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Both coloring book and affirmation of her awesomeness, your pottymouth will likely adore this gift meant to buck up any skewed sense of her bad-*ssness on off days.

F***ing Brilliant One Line a Day Journal

F***ing Brilliant One Line a Day Journal
Chronicle Books

$17 from Chronicle Books

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Just because she drops an F-bomb (or two, or 20) every day doesn’t mean she doesn’t also like fancy things. With its scripted font and metallic accents, you can appeal to her lower and higher minds in one gift.

Swearing Is Good For You: The Amazing Science of Bad Language

Swearing Is Good for You: The Amazing Science of Bad Language
Amazon

$14 from Amazon

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Directly contradicting the concept that swearing is a sign of “a stunted vocabulary or a limited intellect,” author Emma Byrne takes a scientific look in this book at how profanity can actually have “surprising benefits.” 

Related: Cool and Creative Gifts Under $10 for Your Coworkers

Nobody Likes a Douche Canoe Tee

Nobody Likes a Douche Canoe RainBow T-Shirt
Etsy

$9 and up from Etsy

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We don’t know who originated the pejorative “douche canoe,” but we’d like to applaud them. And we can get behind any product that combines snark with images of cute animals.

I’m A Grown A** Lady Sticky Note Packet

I'm A Grown A** Lady Sticky Note Packet
Amazon

$14 from Amazon

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We have a firm appreciation for the boss b*itch statements that this product endorses, which include “that’s gonna be a hard no” and “you should see my active b*itch face.”

The H*ll You Looking At? Coffee Mug

The Hell You Looking at Mug
Amazon

$18 from Amazon

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Yes, again with the profanity and cute animals. Seriously, it gets us every time. Also, this cup is fancy — because it’s made of porcelain — but also functional because it’s microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

Bad B*tch Hand Stamped Rings

Bad B*tch Hand Stamped Rings
Etsy

$13 and up from Etsy

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If she’s a proud feminist who’s all about taking pejoratives and embracing them as positive labels, we’re pretty sure she’s gonna love a set of stamped rings in sterling silver or 14-karat gold.

Small and Sensitive Tee

Small and Sensitive Tee
Look Human

$23 from Look Human

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If her salty vocabulary is complemented by a feisty nature, we’re pretty sure she’ll get a kick out of this tee, which comes in a few different styles in gray and black.

Meet the Writer

Kris is a veteran writer, editor, and graphic designer. She’s worked for newspapers including the Rocky Mountain News, and as managing editor for Dallas-based Advocate Magazines and Modern In Denver magazine. Over the course of her career