20 Reasons Not to Have a Wedding

Traditional weddings are overrated, fraught with anxiety, and often cost as much as a down payment on a new home. Save yourselves, and your guests, the hassle and expense and go another route. Eloping, hosting an intimate dinner with the two families and close friends, throwing a big party, or just a honeymoon for the couple are all fun options with a smaller price tag. The first year of marriage is challenging for most couples anyway, and throwing in a multi family expensive event doesn’t tend to help. With so many obvious reasons not to have a wedding, it’s a wonder anyone does it anymore.

Save Money for a Home

Whether it’s a financial gift from parents, or a chunk of change you have stashed away for a wedding fun, save that money and put it toward something more meaningful than a one time event: a home. Traditional weddings often cost the same amount as a couple is willing to spend on a downpayment on a new house or apartment, which will provide way more memories, pictures, and lasting happiness.

Invest in Travel

Forgo the one day affair in exchange for a once in a lifetime travel opportunity; go to India for a month, travel through South America, or just chill on the beaches of Jamaica for a week. Traveling helps cement the bonds between two people, and you could even invite your friends along for part of the ride in lieu of spending on the wedding.

Avoid Offending the Uninvited

The guest list is always controversial for weddings with both sides often getting pressure from their families and friends. It’s common to lose a few close alliances over the course of getting married by not inviting all of the people who were expecting to celebrate your big day. Without a wedding, no one gets offended.

Avoid Familial Stress

There’s nothing quite like forcing two families together for what is considered to be one of the most important days of your lives, and theirs. Whether it’s clashing in-laws or the fact that your own family drives you up a wall, familial stress surrounding weddings can make it feel more like a punishment than a celebration.

Skip the Awkward In-Law Formalities

Adopting another family as your own comes with ups and downs, especially when it comes to the big day. Mother-in-laws, in particular, have a history of causing major rifts between couples, while co-opting the wedding with their own agenda. Rather than suffer through planning, rehearsals, and the actual ceremony with that awkwardness, get to know your in-laws comfortably, in a natural way over the years.

Get Better Registry Gifts

Just because you don’t have a wedding doesn’t mean you can’t have a registry. A simple note to your friends and family that you are getting hitched and are but having a wedding will be a relief to many, and you can have a registry up and ready for those who want to send a gift. Just be sure to mention that it is 100% optional.

Save Your Friends and Family the Expense

Weddings are expensive for guests too, between traveling to the location, accommodations, attire and gifts, it’s often a significant expense, both in time and money. Saving your crew the money will be greatly appreciated, and you can spend that money to celebrate together in a more meaningful way when you have time to actually hang out.

Avoid Pressure to Conform to Tradition

These days people are not as attached to social conventions and religious traditions, still, many find themselves mindlessly going along with the wedding traditions of their families or friends. Rather than do it “just because,” think about what would be most meaningful to you and your partner.

Buy a Dress You’ll Actually Wear Again

Just one more expensive item, a wedding dress is totally impractical. Wouldn’t it be more special to splurge on a stylish dress that you could show off more than once? It will be even more special when you wear it again, because it will carry the memory of your special day.

Save the Big Party for a Big Anniversary

Many people want to have a wedding for the party, which is totally legitimate, but why not wait a decade? With the passing of time you’ll have a better idea of who your friends as a couple are, and likely more money to throw the kind of party you always wanted without cutting corners.

Give Your Relationship Time to Cement Without Pressure

Most newlyweds are under an extreme amount of pressure to start their new lives together, which is not easy. They say the first year of marriage is the hardest, so why add to it by planning what is likely to be one of the most stressful events of your lives?

Splurge on a Meal You’ll Actually Get to Enjoy

Couples spend a lot of time and effort picking out every last detail of the food and drinks for their wedding, but rarely get to actually enjoy it between making the rounds and being caught up in the moment. For the cost of a wedding you could have a meal at almost any restaurant and even have enough to invite a few friends or family members.

Celebrate the Intimate Moment Privately

Marriage is a big deal, and a very intimate moment in a person’s life. Not all people want to be the center of attention with a giant spotlight on them. There’s nothing wrong with creating a private setting to enjoy the union as a personal event.

Use the Money for a Really Nice Photo Session

Wanting memories and beautiful photos is a top priority for many people, but it’s no reason to throw a whole wedding. You could even rent a gown and/or tux and pay for a very high end photo session without actually having the wedding, getting the best of both worlds.

Invest in Nicer Rings

Rings are one of the marriage traditions that theoretically last forever, but too often they get put on the backburner in exchange for spending on the wedding itself. Investing in beautiful rings with the money you’ll save, makes a difference to the physical symbol of your union that you wear every day.

Use the Money to Pay Off Debt

Young couples often have debt, which is a difficult way to start a life together. Pooling the resources to spend on each other rather than outsiders is a much more generous act of love for your partner, and one that will actually contribute to your married life.

Choose a Date and Location That Works for You

Couples stress about dates and locations that can accommodate the most people from their guest list, but you can never appease everyone. Often times couples will settle on a days and places that seem convenient for other people, rather than ones that are special to them.

Keep Your Private Life Private

In this age of social media it can feel like there is no privacy anymore. For those couples who don’t want their private lives all over the internet, not having a traditional wedding is a good option.

Eliminate the Stress of Planning the Wedding

Even the most low key and relaxed people turn into major stress balls when it comes to planning the details of a wedding. Marrying the love of your life shouldn’t feel stressful, it should feel joyful and easy.

Be the Envy of Your Friends Planning Weddings

We’ve all been there, cursing our friend or family member for having a stupidly elaborate wedding that makes us use vacation days to travel somewhere we don’t even like, stay in an expensive hotel, and not even get to hang out together. Rather than be another basic person with a boring and expensive wedding, do something cool instead.