With inflation squeezing grocery budgets tighter than ever, a new trend is shaking up the Thanksgiving table: hosts asking guests to pay a cover fee to feast on what will probably be some dry, disappointing turkey anyway. In fact, times are so rough that a caller to The Maney and LauRen show, a popular radio program, said their aunt not only charged $10 a head for Thanksgiving, but even set out a tip jar at her own holiday table. I beg your pardon?! What do you think, is charging guests for Thanksgiving dinner going too far, or does it make sense in this economy?
Are People Really Charging Guests for Thanksgiving Dinner?
Yes, they really are. Reddit threads are overflowing with people describing the moment they found out their host expected payment for a seat at the table. While most Redditors think the idea is bonkers, a few argue it’s acceptable if all guests agree to split the costs. Others are less pragmatic: “IF there is an entry fee…then I am under no obligation to attend,” writes one Redditor. And though most users agree that hosting isn’t cheap and times are genuinely tough, most say being charged by a family member or friend to attend a holiday dinner feels uncomfortable, awkward, or straight-up offensive.
“Yeah, I feel like maybe if you can’t afford to do Thanksgiving this year, you should probably graciously bow out of the responsibility of hosting,” writes one user in response to someone asking if it was socially acceptable to charge family members a fee. “Charging your family is bogus,” adds another user. “If you can’t afford to host, just tell everyone.”
Is It Ever Okay to Charge a Cover for Thanksgiving?
Traditionally, if you host the meal, you cover the meal, period. That’s the baseline etiquette. The Washington Post agrees: “There is no financial justification for a cover charge for Thanksgiving dinner or any other celebration.” Once you start asking guests to chip in, the whole spirit of hospitality goes from generous to transactional. “This trend of transferring financial responsibility from the host, who is traditionally expected to pay, to the guest is monetizing fellowship,” adds the Post.
That said, there are circumstances where sharing the burden makes sense, but they hinge on clear communication and equal footing. Some Redditors argue that if it’s clear, voluntary, explained in advance, and all guests are on the same page, then it isn’t the biggest deal. The ethical concern comes when the monetary expectation is hidden, guests feel pressured, or the host frames it as mandatory. In short, it’s less about the money, but about the intention. If the host says, “Please bring dessert or chip in if you’re able,” that’s different from, “You owe me 30 bucks, or you don’t get a plate.”
Ultimately, it comes down to transparency and tone. Hosting a meal means absorbing the cost, or at least being very clear if you’re asking for help. Once you charge a fee, you’ve shifted the gathering from hosting to eventing, and that can leave guests feeling like they’re going to a restaurant instead of a family dinner.
Better Ways to Reduce the Cost
If the cost of hosting is stretching your budget, there are ways to keep Thanksgiving warm (and tasty) without turning it into a ledger.
- Make it a potluck. Invite guests to bring specific dishes rather than a generic “something.” For example: “Could you bring the sweet potato casserole?” or “Would you pick up a salad or rolls for eight?” This helps split both costs and labor while still keeping the host’s role clear. It also builds shared ownership of the meal, rather than shifting costs to guests. “Carefully go through the menu, assigning dishes that will feed however many are coming,” advises the Post.
- Simplify the menu. Instead of trying to deliver five sides, three appetizers, and desserts, choose your favorites. Fewer dishes = fewer ingredients = less stress. Hosts often feel pressured to compete with holiday spreads seen on social media, but paring back doesn’t mean less festive or delicious; it means less frantic.
- Host fewer people. Smaller guest list = smaller bill. If you’re feeling the pinch, keep the gathering small and intimate. Sure, it might mean fewer cousins or coworkers at the table this year, but you can still deliver a thoughtful, scrumptious meal that your loved ones will cherish and remember.
- Skip the “free catering” mindset. Some hosts go all out by cooking up a storm and making extra so their guests can take leftovers home. The Post suggests: Don’t cook extra just because you expect it to happen. “Manage people’s expectations by announcing that you won’t overcook,” says the Post. You can also manage portions by discouraging guests from packing massive to-go boxes by just not providing take-out boxes or aluminum trays.
- Be honest about your budget. You don’t owe anyone a five-course feast. A simple, but genuine, “My budget’s tight this year, but I’d love to host you for turkey and pie,” communicates authenticity rather than obligation. If the budget still won’t budge, it’s perfectly fine to say, “Let’s just keep it low-key this year,” and serve a pared-down meal that’s still thoughtful and special.
- Rotate or skip hosting. If you host every year and it drains you, suggest a rotation among family/friends, or offer to attend at someone else’s place. Or simply declare: “I’m going to skip hosting this year, but I’d love to be your guest.” Removing the pressure to host is itself a cost (and stress-saver).
The Bottom Line
In the end, Thanksgiving is meant to be about gathering, gratitude, and connection — not invoices, Zelle requests, or awkward Venmo transactions at the door. If you find yourself crunching turkey-cost numbers and wondering whether guests will balk at a cover charge, that might be your cue to rethink the kind of meal you’re offering. Plus, a simpler and more affordable Thanksgiving spread can still be just as memorable and special.
More Thanksgiving Stories You Might Like
- America’s Most Hated Thanksgiving Sides You’ll Regret Spending Time and Money On — Find out which sides you might want to skip this year.
- How a Cheap Box of Baking Powder Could Save Your Thanksgiving Meal — For such a simple ingredient, baking powder can rescue multiple dishes at Thanksgiving dinner.
- 12 Things You Should Never Do on Thanksgiving — There are some unspoken rules revolving around Turkey Day that should be revered. Find out what they are so you don’t have a holiday blunder.
